Online Training for Child Sexual Assault

27 09 2012

Darkness 2 Light offers a low-cost ($10) online training called Stewards of Children for parents, educators, and other adults involved with youth to better recognize child sexual abuse, and give them some tools to interrupt the grooming process or get help for the child. This program began in 2004 as a live presentation, and in 2006 went online to a larger audience.

I began this online training yesterday, and so far it seems fairly basic yet comprehensive. Appears to be a useful educational tool for anyone who works with children.

Have you gone through it? Send in your comment and observations.

If you want to check it out, visit the Darkness 2 Light website and look at the very top for the Online Training Login (next to the social media buttons). Then let us know what you think.

Darkness 2 Light’s mission is to empower people to prevent child sexual abuse. Their programs are intended to raise awareness of the prevalence and consequences of child sexual abuse by educating adults about the steps they can take to prevent, recognize and react responsibly to the reality of child sexual abuse.


Amy Cuddy – powerful body language video

21 11 2011

This video from Harvard’s Amy Cuddy shows how powerful body language is effective. How, in just TWO MINUTES a day, you can change how you are perceived and treated by others.

Amy Cuddy: Power Poses from PopTech on Vimeo.

I’ve been teaching some of this for a while, and it’s good to see this as a resource. AND it can also influence how we are seen as self-defense teachers. Even though Cuddy’s work is more about business, it is easy to translate into a self-defense and personal safety context.

Free boundaries workshop Thursday night!

11 05 2011

“If you have a hard time saying No, if drawing a line fills you with dread, if you frequently find yourself doing stuff you don’t really want to do, or if you are scared of sounding like a b*tch or a wimp if you set a boundary…”  consider signing up for “Guilt-Free Boundaries.”

Sounds like a great chance to learn some new ways to teach verbal skills—and this woman can do it over the phone! I haven’t taken this workshop (I plan to tomorrow), but I did take an in-person, experiential workshop with her on “Asking For What You Want,” and it was excellent! So why not grab a little professional development? Maybe I’ll “see” you there. –Lauren

Beyond ‘no’: subtleties and complexities of refusal

12 04 2011

Mythcommunication: It’s Not That They Don’t Understand, They Just Don’t Like The Answer

This piece talks about how a direct ‘no’ is disfavored in western/English-speaking culture and how other kinds of refusals are generally clearly understood. It contains thought-provoking insights into what ‘nos’ work and can push us all to honor our students’ myriad ways of saying ‘no’.



Money for Nothing

5 04 2011

Today’s post is from Patrick Williams of You Rock! Communications. Modified only slightly to speak to the self-defense teacher. This tip is useful not only when a potential student contacts you about your program, but equally important, when teaching an interactive class to better engage your students.

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One of the biggest hit songs of the 80’s was “Money For Nothing” by Dire Straits. Chances are good you’ve heard it a few times.

What most people don’t know is that band leader and lyricist Mark Knopfler didn’t have to work very hard to write the song.

Knopfler overheard a conversation in an electronics store where two employees were discussing what they saw on the showroom televisions, all of which were tuned to MTV.  He quickly jotted down the banter, then repeated it virtually word-for-word in the song. The song become a big hit because anyone who isn’t a rock star could relate to the message.

Unknowingly, Knopfler tapped into one of the strongest selling techniques in the word, and you can use it to make selling easier than ever.

The technique is simply this: speak your customer’s language!

If you talk too far above a potential student, you’ll lose them. The same thing happens if you talk beneath them. Listen to what words they use to express their safety concerns, and use those.  Try to match the verbal style of your students and clients as closely as you can, and they will be more comfortable and open with you. Repeat some of the same phrases they use and you will help them trust you to guide them in making the right choice of class or program.

If you offer classes to companies, do a little research on their industry and make sure you use some of the same terminology they typically encounter every day. This suggests to prospects that you are knowledgeable about their unique business and might have valuable insights to share.

The truth is there is no such thing as ‘money for nothing’; but, when you mirror and match your customer’s language, you’ll start closing more business than you would without it.

© 2011 YOU ROCK!®


Patrick Williams, Hit-Maker
Helping people and businesses be #1 in their market! ·  253-318-7503

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Self defense teachers’ conference grand finale

15 07 2010

Another peek at some highlights of the annual gathering from on-site blogger Lauren Taylor of Defend Yourself in DC:

With wisdom in the fields of self defense, psychology, and violence against women, Darlene Defour  of the Harlem School of JuJutsu and Self Defense in New York City helped teachers recognize “micro aggressions” in daily life, especially racist ones, that happen routinely, and helped us strategize about how we can interrupt them and help our students to do the same.

And for the grand finale, Alex Trebek wannabe Linda Ramzy Ranson of the Women’s Empowerment Self Defense Academy in the Bronx, New York, led a heavyweight  experienced panel (Jaye Spiro, Nancy Lanoue, Carol Middleton, Sonya Richardson, Darlene Defour, Janet Aalfs , Martha Thompson and more) in a speedy session of Q&As on self defense teaching. All those teaching questions you have? Here’s where to get them answered! For example:

Q: How do you reach seniors? A: Gerontologists and bingo games

Q: What would you do with 50 teens in one group who can’t pay attention? A: Set it up with the organizers to have two groups, each with two instructors

Q: What do you teach if the target is pinned face down and the attacker is planning to penetrate her from behind? A: Use your hips, or wait for a better moment to move.

Q: How do you avoid burnout? A: Listening to my students, relying on my other instructors, regular massages…

These are only a small sample of the questions asked and a ridiculously condensed version of the answers. But I hope it’s enough to give the flavor of the range of support, wisdom and inspiration available through NWMAF’s network of self defense instructors at the conference and year-round. We’re tentatively scheduled for the third week in July 2011. Stay tuned to Safety Net for more details, and hope to see you there!

Boundary setting in real life

18 05 2010

Advice columnist Carolyn Hax gives clear instructions on how to be assertive in the face of a family member’s offensive comments, and what to do if the offender doesn’t listen. Brilliant!